Letting Go

"Experts" say it takes anywhere from 21 to 30 days to break a habit. I don't know if that's true, since I can't recall many instances where I've actively decided to change a bad habit. 

A few times I've had to go cold turkey and give something up. Case in point: I learned I had some food allergies/intolerances. The consequences of eating these foods were unpleasant enough to make it pretty easy to give them up and not look back.

But in general, I have not really had much success in changing my stripes.

For example, this past weekend we ordered a cake for Monsieur's birthday. We were expecting 20 people so I ordered a big cake and it seemed even larger once it arrived. We still have quite a bit left, despite the fact that we had cake on Saturday, Sunday and  last night. And it's still remarkably fresh and tasty.

The point is, though, that both Monsieur and I are having a hard time just letting it go and feeling that it's okay to throw the leftover cake away. Neither of us works in a place where it'd be easy to bring the leftover cake, either, or else this would be an option:

Joking aside, though, why is it so hard to let go? Despite my best efforts to adjust my mindset and ask myself WWFD and think like a French person, my first instinct is to think, "Oooh, cake! I never get a good cake like this! I have to enjoy it!!" 

The idea that I never get cake is what's at the heart of my hesitation but it is a totally erroneous assumption!! I give myself plenty of treats, believe me. And, if I really starting thinking like a French person, I would know that there will always be another opportunity to have cake. In fact, I am allowed to go get myself some cake anytime I darn well please, because, well, "I'm worth it!" and so there is no reason to fear I won't ever have another chance at having a slice of cake again.  

When you really look at what is motivating you (fear) and how your mind is working (irrationally) then you really start to realize how ridiculous it all is!!

So, perhaps the "experts" are right and it is just a matter of time until you can change how you think and drop a bad habit. I guess we'll see.

Anyway, gotta go. Have to go throw away some leftover cake!

à bientôt!

Motivation & Rewards

Many, many diets and weight loss programs that I've read about encourage you to set up goals and rewards at regular intervals.

The treat-oriented part of me always liked that concept. Unfortunately, it didn't ever really work for me.  Maybe because the reality of losing 5 lbs "cost" me a lot more than what a manicure or new lipstick ever did. I mean, honestly, do you know how hard it is to lose 5 lbs, especially if you've been holding onto extra weight for years? (Not to mention losing even more weight!)

Let me just go on record and say that if I manage to lose a significant amount of weight and I can fit into a size 8, you can be darn sure I'll be splurging on something other than a pair of jeans. Something more like this:

This is an Hermes blouse and it's a size 8. I found it on The Real Real, which is an online luxury consignment 'store'. This top, because it is being sold on consignment, cost a bit more than a pair of premium denim jeans. Now that's what I call a reward!

Anyway, when I was reading about the French attitude towards food, diet, and health, I thought it was very interesting to see that there isn't really that same concept of progress and rewards.  Why is that??

Well, I think part of the reason is that French women see being healthy and slender as their right. They deserve to be slim and beautiful and cherished. And likewise, getting a manicure and a haircut is part of a woman's regular grooming or 'maintenance' and not something that has to be earned through weight loss.

So, who's right? Is the American system of goals and rewards actually an effective weight loss tool? Or should we embrace the French way and look at weight loss in the same way as we would look at any other element of living a happy, healthy life? As something that is meant to be and deserved, and not as something that we need to earn. What do you think?

Afternoon indulgence

I'm usually a coffee drinker (decaf Americanos, to be precise) but every once in a while I yearn for something a touch more Jane Austen. When those moments strike, a small pot of Darjeeling or some special blend from a fine tea purveyor like Harney & Sons hits the spot. A particular favorite is the "Paris" blend, which combines black tea with vanilla, caramel and Bergamot flavors.

Normally, a small shortbread or butter cookie, or perhaps a cream scone, would complete the picture, but I decided to provide moral support to my Kosher Monsieur Souris and Passover started on Monday evening. So, for eight days he isn't eating any grains (or grain-derived products). It definitely won't kill me to cut down on breads, pasta, and baked items for a week, and I figure it's the least I could do after making him eat fish on Fridays during Lent.

Sweet endings

If I had to identify my single biggest weakness, diet-wise, I'd have to confess it is my sweet tooth. I love, love, looooove sweet treats. My favorites are ice cream, chocolate, and pastries like the patisserie that the French are known for the world over. In fact, my favorite shop in all of Paris is probably
Ladurée.  
Last time I was in Paris, I even snuck a few photos at the store in St. Germain:

So, I have to confess that when I embarked on this French experiment of mine, I wondered about the French attitude towards all these delicious confections. I mean, what is the point of being able to make all these wonderful treats if you are never going to enjoy them?

Then, as I did my research, I started to understand how they French did it. Again, the key lies in balance and moderation.  Sure, the French eat dessert and they have access to delicious croissants and macarons and other baked works of art, but they view them as treats, not everyday staples. Their typical weeknight desserts come in the form of fruit, not frangipane! And breakfast bread is baguette, not croissants or pain au chocolat. Those treats are reserved for the weekend or some other special occasion.

Luckily, I am not a big fan of dessert. (Hmm...maybe because I always tended to overeat and was too stuffed for dessert??) But, in my former eating life, I would eat something sweet every single day (!!), usually with an afternoon coffee. 

So, it was a wonderful surprise to read in The French Don't Diet Plan: 10 Simple Steps To Stay Thin For Life that the author, Dr. William Clower, recommends incorporating an "ender" into your daily diet. That is, as he describes it, some small sweet treat that you enjoy some 10 minutes after you finish a meal (a meal that didn't already include what we would normally think of as dessert, like cake, ice cream, or pie!) and that serves as a sort of epicurean punctuation mark and tells your brain, "Okay, I'm done eating now until my next regularly scheduled meal." 

With this in mind, I looked for that special item that I would use as my "ender" and I found it in the form of extra-dark chocolate from Lindt:

As Dr. Clower recommends, I take a small amount of this super rich chocolate and I let it melt in my mouth, savoring the flavor and letting it cover every taste bud. With chocolate that's this high in cocoa a little goes a long way, so you don't need much to feel satisfied. I'd almost go so far as to say I think it would be nearly impossible to overdose on such dark chocolate!

In any case, I've found that having just a bit of chocolate after lunch or dinner really makes me feel like I got a "treat" in, but it doesn't derail me like a daily raspberry-chocolate-mousse-tart or eclair might. 

C'est magnifique!